Education: We found the solution!

Education: We found the solution!

These events took place in a fictional country. Any resemblance to an existing county is purely coincidental.

1972

Minister: Citizens, the level continues to decline in our schools. More and more students are failing the French language test. In order to address this issue, we will give a boost and double the dictates…”

Maas: “Dictate! Dictations! Dictations!”

1975

Minister: Citizens, the level continues to decline in our schools. Our studies show that we focused a lot on written French. What is important is not that children write without errors, but that they are not afraid to express themselves. So we will focus on oral French. »

Liturgy: “Oral! Oral! Oral!”

1980

Minister: Citizens, the level continues to decline in our schools. In order to remedy this situation, we have decided to increase the reading hours. »

Maas: “Read! Reading! Reading! »

1985

Minister: Citizens, the level continues to decline in our schools. According to our studies, the reason is that our children read too much and do not move enough. So we will increase the number of hours devoted to physical education. »

Maas: “Physical education! Physical education ! »

1990

Minister: Citizens, the level continues to decline in our schools. So we decided to completely change our methods and implement a reform that revolutionized education in Switzerland. »

Requiem: “Reform! Reform! Reshape!”

1995

Minister: Citizens, the level continues to decline in our schools. So we decided to abandon the reform and return to traditional, proven methods, such as “by heart”. »

Massa: “Heart by heart! By heart! By heart!”

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2002

Minister: Citizens, the level continues to decline in our schools. The school is very detached from the reality of the youth. From today, we will be placing computers in each class. »

Mas: “Computers! Order #%s! Order #%s!”

2010

Minister: Citizens, the level continues to decline in our schools. Studies show that computers are bad for learning. So let’s go back to the good old blackboard. »

Maas: “Painting! Table! Table! »

2019

Minister: Citizens, the level continues to decline in our schools. So we decided to change the grammar and spelling to make it easier. »

Masse: “Grammar! Grammar! Grammar! »

2023

Minister: Citizens, the level continues to decline in our schools. So we decided to embrace inclusive writing to better reflect diversity…”

Mass: “Diversity! Diversity! »

And so on…

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About the Author: Hermínio Guimarães

"Introvertido premiado. Viciado em mídia social sutilmente charmoso. Praticante de zumbis. Aficionado por música irritantemente humilde."

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